Pilcrows and paragraphs

Ready for my next micro-rant?

Some people think run-on sentences are bad. I agree. But I think that a increasingly worse problem is the run-on paragraph. Frequently seen in blog posts, emails, and love notes to those special someones, the paragraph is an endangered species in many literary forms.

Answers.com’s definition of a paragraph is:

A distinct division of written or printed matter that begins on a new, usually indented line, consists of one or more sentences, and typically deals with a single thought or topic or quotes one speaker’s continuous words.

Too often we find people who write pages about their life, the universe, and everything else, as a single, run-on paragraph. Paragraphs are meant to help separate different thoughts or topics into chunks small enough for the reader’s comprehension.

Unwieldy paragraphs are a great danger to the modern human race. One of humanities major advantages over other earth-animal species is its ability to communicate effectively. As run-on paragraphs limit this ability to communicate, we are all in danger of reverting back to caveman methods of communicating which included the popular hit-someone-with-a-club-to-steal-a-wife. Downfalls of economies, government, and television series such as The Office could all be products of the increasing use of run-on paragraphs.

Save the human race! Save our dignity and the nobility that makes us better than the weeds of planet earth. Keep your paragraphs short! Write them more distinctly. Communicate more effectively. Share your ideas so that they can be understood. From the bottom of my heart, and in memory of my dead VCR, I thank you for your efforts.