Macey’s is my favorite place

Well, the anxiety is back. I feel like I can’t breath. I feel scared to death of life and of the situation I’m in. I feel like I got enough insight into life to realize what sort of situation I’m in. I’m scared because I think that I need to really think about things, and I think that the more I think about things, the worse off I’m going to feel about things.

I went to Macey’s. I didn’t know why, until I got there. The reason why is that I knew that if I was wandering around in public at Macey’s then I couldn’t break down and cry. I’m not sure if I have a good reason to cry, it might just be the anxiety. I totally bought a bottle of Martinelli’s Sparkling Cider. I’m drinking it now. Something about drinking directly out of a glass bottle makes you feel better. I also bought milk and bread, but that was it. However, I spent almost an hour in Macey’s. I needed the time to walk and think and stuff.

Double crossed double betrayal. Maybe that is what I fear most. Will my further thinking inspire further insight that will lead me to such belief?

Driving fast with really loud music is also good theropy. I think I need to make a mix of music to describe how I feel now. This mix shall be called, “Inspired by Insight.” That should be the title of my next blog entry.

P.S. My arm is spazzing out. Oh, and is it wrong to spell check a password protected blog entry?

P.P.S. I also figured out why I’m so scared to sleep. It’s because I do my crying on my pillow, and I don’t want to go there.

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